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I'm here to kick some resonance cascade scenario ass and swallow pineapples... and I'm all out of pineapples... on Mars!
March 16th 2004, 16:38 CET by Marsh Davies

Gamespot, amongst many other fatuous and pointless websites, have commented on the glorious gib-splattering year of FPS gaming ahead. Indeed, the imminent releases (read: delays) of Unreal Tournament 2004, Half-Life 2, Doom 3 co-op and so on, do leave me tingling with soon-to-be-disappointed anticipation.

What better way to herald in the best games of 1864, or whenever they were originally scheduled for release, than to have a retrospective debate upon the top ten FPS games of yesteryear? - thus filling editorial space with ease whilst making the readership feel like their opinions matter.

And since PlanetCrap has been as dead as the Mega-Beaver recently, why not copy said fatuity and gross pointlessness?

Gamespot's list starred, in no preferencial order, Battlefield 1942, Doom, Rainbow Six, UT, Halo, Half-Life, Counter-Strike, Duke Nukem 3D, Goldeneye and, of course, Quake.

However, for our own musings, I suggest that the FPS games be separated into multiplayer and singleplayer categories, with mods standing alone on their own merits (though modability might be a criteria in rating a game). Judgements would be better based on personal enjoyment (at the time) rather than impact or importance to the genre.

My personal list would be...

SP:
Half-Life
Unreal
Quake 2
Doom & Doom 2
Quake

MP:
Medal of Honour (objective based teamplay)
Half-Life (deathmatch)
Team Fortress (for Quake)
Quake 3 (deathmatch)
Unreal Tournament (capture the flag)

Failing this, prizes will* be awarded for coming up with a sentence that most concisely references as many FPS games as possible.

*not
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#2051 by bago
2004-04-17 00:23:53
manga_Rando@hotmail.com
Girls + Makeup + Booze + an hour to wait before dinner leads to that.

That and knowing you won't be back to that town for another 7 months.

Oh my dear Buddha
Save me from myself, lead me to nirvana with your fatty fat belly
#2052 by bago
2004-04-17 00:25:18
manga_Rando@hotmail.com
That's a lot of thats. Almost 4. At the same time.

Oh my dear Buddha
Save me from myself, lead me to nirvana with your fatty fat belly
#2053 by Ergo
2004-04-17 00:27:37
#2051 bago
Girls + Makeup + Booze + an hour to wait before dinner leads to that.

That and knowing you won't be back to that town for another 7 months.

That explains a lot.

Machina improba! Vel mihi ede potum vel mihi redde nummos meos!
DVDs
#2054 by Shadarr
2004-04-17 00:31:17
shadarr@yahoo.com http://digital-luddite.com
I concur.  Actually, the booze is unnecessary.  Chicks just love putting makeup on a guy.  Also, braiding their hair (if it's long enough).  It's probably some sort of latent Borg tendency.
#2055 by Creole Ned
2004-04-17 01:45:11
The Borg are into hair braiding and make-up?

"I don't bemoan the great paste" - LPMiller
#2056 by Creole Ned
2004-04-17 01:46:03
"Resistance makes no fashion sense."
"Prepare to be made over."

Yeah, I can see that. Carry on.

"I don't bemoan the great paste" - LPMiller
#2057 by Darkseid-D
2004-04-17 01:59:19
rogerboal@hotmail.com
Did'nt you catch the Borg guest starring in Sex In the City?

Do not go gently into that good night.
Old age should burn and rage at the close of day.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
#2058 by LPMiller
2004-04-17 05:12:38
lpmiller@gotapex.com http://www.gotapex.com
Resistance is Futile. You Will Exfoliate.

Patriots don't need grammar or spellings for rid the world and tyranny. - Leslie Nassar, 3/28/2004
#2059 by bago
2004-04-17 06:05:34
manga_Rando@hotmail.com
How to accessorize your borg.

Oh my dear Buddha
Save me from myself, lead me to nirvana with your fatty fat belly
#2060 by Warren Marshall
2004-04-17 15:05:48
http://www.wantonhubris.com/
#2045 Bailey
Yeesh.

I concur.

"Cheap Garbage Disposal Canít Handle Femur"
#2061 by The_Joker
2004-04-17 16:39:13
http://www.jackinworld.com
Will have myself painted for groupsex.

Joker, Ph.D. Procedural Assholian Behaviour, Pedophilosopher
- All your ass are belong to my wang Jafd. Prepare to are penetration.
"I fart in THX." - Sgt_Hulka

PENETRATOR: Rise of the Wang Cuming "When it's done".
#2062 by LPMiller
2004-04-17 19:41:57
lpmiller@gotapex.com http://www.gotapex.com
Not sure that's how you want to phrase that, unless you plan on having group sex with the Queer Eye guys.

Patriots don't need grammar or spellings for rid the world and tyranny. - Leslie Nassar, 3/28/2004
#2063 by crash
2004-04-18 10:22:17
Interesting picture. That's not nearly as bad as I expected.

By this time tomorrow we can be doing BODY SHOTS off HOOKERS in some MEXICAN HELLHOLE
#2064 by Anonymous
2004-04-18 18:50:14
Interesting picture. That's not nearly as bad as I expected.

You with your corrupt fantasy!
#2065 by crash
2004-04-18 21:32:45
I've seen more of bago's pics than that one. Given the descriptions on the others, and what came out of that... yeah, it's not unreasonable to have expected a far different image there.

By this time tomorrow we can be doing BODY SHOTS off HOOKERS in some MEXICAN HELLHOLE
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